mr-onion's Diaryland Diary

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I sure hope santa smokes Marlboros

Whilst nipping down to the corner shop today for a pack of smokes, I got distracted by a clothes shop standing in my way.

There I am, hopping around on one leg in the fitting room, trying on a rockin� pair of tweed trousers with glittery bits in, when I overhear the shopgirls talking about their upcoming trip to a local gay club for the Christmas bash "The Queen That Stole Christmas". They continue their chat, speaking of a gay biblical drinking game that they play there.

Contestant: Alex, I�ll take Leviticus for 200 shooters please

Host: All rightee. The apostle he frequently identified as an obvious closeted poof from his New Testament writings.

Contestant: Who is Paul?

Host: Correct!

Think of the possibilities! I ran out of that shop, throwing money at the ladies for the trousers, and went home, mind racing, thinking of how to make this into a sellable board game.

As I was walking, I noticed Santa square in my path. He had the whole red suit, beard and bell scenario going on and was heading in my direction.

I thought to myself "this man�s obviously some kind of lunatic. Keep walking and don�t look sideways".

He approached me with a "hello little girl"

I started to smile and mumbled "Merry Christmas Santa!"

And grinned all the way home.

it�s shameful how suggestible I am.

3:23 p.m. - 2004-12-05

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