mr-onion's Diaryland Diary

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Maybe just one more spanakopita

When I look at the most loyal relationships of my life, they usually involve a teenage boy going "do you want extra sauce with that?". I am a fierce creature of habit and now I have to sever another important relationship: The Falafel Hut

I mean it was much much easier weaning myself off Subway subs and daily Slurpies and soft pretzels, but falafels? It's like losing a kidney or my Virgin Mary vodka bottle.

The pattern keeps repeating: I find a new food place and like it - and I return constantly - the fast food people start getting friendlier and cozier with me - then they start giving me freebies - always a plus! - they then begin to give me free stuff on my birthday - and then I get uncomfortable about their closeness and stop going there. I don't not appreciate their friendliness, I just have very firm boundaries.

The woman at the petrol station (Tattoo Pat)was labouring under the illusion that I came in twice daily for her sparkling conversation instead of considering I might have a substance abuse problem where Slurpies are concerned. She did eventually ask me out for drinks *ahem* and I felt so terrible for her because she hated her job so much - we used to look through the classifieds together, searching for a new position for her that didn't somehow involve me.

"hmmmm how about this one Pat - Night Watchman - good hours - fairly decent money - and loads of chances to catch up on your chain smoking".

The boy at Subway asked me out for a date. The soft pretzel guy tried to touch my hand one day while I was nattering on about "lots of extra cheese sauce please!". And now the Falafel Hut guys are becoming too flirtatious, even though it never fails to score for extra garlic sauce. But "hey sweetheart, you want that large?" I can live without. *sob* They even gave me free baklava on my birthday.

I'm so torn.

Goodbye 24-hour Child Slave Labour Turkish Chip Shop!

Farewell All You Can Eat Indian Restaurant!

So long Subway!

Au revoir, Jewish Bagel Bakery!

Hasta Manana Si Senor Restaurant (home of happy hour margaritas for a quid)!

Auf Wiedersehen, Soft Pretzel stand!

Bye-Bye Cafe des Arts with its awesome blueberry white chocolate cheesecake!

Opa to you, Spiro's Greek Taverna!

Namaste, Taj Mahal Indian Restaurant!

Good night sweet Borek stand at the farmer's market!

...how will I live without you all?

Maybe I should learn to COOK.

10:24 p.m. - 2004-11-18

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